SFR 234: Eustress, And The Wall - Stephen Larsen

SFR 234: Eustress, And The Wall

Apr 16th, 2019 anchorwave

It’s unlikely that any of us will voluntarily put ourselves in a position of “growth-pain.” However, we need to grow. Here’s how I put my back against the wall…

E-U-S-T-R-E-S-S… is a massively important concept!

Eustress comes from the word euphoria… and the dictionary definition is beneficial stress.

I googled it…

Google positive stress

Eustress means beneficial stress, either psychological, physical, biochemical, radiological.”

The term literally means “good stress.”

So…

There’s Distress and there’s Eustress

What does it have to do with Sales Funnel Radio? A LOT, lemme tell ya!

EUSTRESS… NOT, YOU STRESS!

When I coaching people, there’s often a certain amount of stress that gets caused in that person’s life as they take action or do something for the first time.

If they’re NOT normally an action taker this stress can feel overwhelming.

Positive stress vs negative stress

However, know the difference between distress and eustress can be a game changer.

Eustress is positive growth stress; like the kind you would get from pushing yourself at the gym.

Eustress is positive stress

BIG MOVES BY MY LITTLE SIS…

My sister, Marie, is awesome.

She’s getting married soon, so by the time this episode goes out, she will probably be married. (Congratulations, Marie)

Marie Larsen positive stress

However, about two years ago, she was a poor college student who wanted to go to Funnel Hacking Live. She didn’t have a business or any real savings…

She reached out to me and asked:

“Stephen, I have enough money to either buy a Funnel Hacking Live ticket with a plane ticket and a hotel room… or my groceries and bills for the next month… What should I do?”

Talk about a Big Brother Moment…

I decided to I ask a question to help her weigh up her options and make a decision.

I said: Marie, if you were to go and pay for your groceries and your bills for the next month, what is the likelihood that you will put yourself in a place of eustress and come up with the money to go to Funnel Hacking Live?

She said: “I probably won’t.”

Marie Larsen personal growth

I said: “I agree with you, you probably won’t… most human beings wouldn’t.”

Next, I asked: “If you were to go buy a Funnel Hacking Live ticket, plane ride, and all that stuff… what’s the likelihood that you are NOT going to figure out how to eat and then die?”

… and she goes: “I’m gonna figure out how to live and eat.”

There you go: “In my opinion, that’s your answer!”

  • If you know that it’s good for you…
  • If you know that it’s the thing that’s cause more success…

… then put your back against the wall voluntarily, and do it that way.

And that’s exactly what she did.

She bought a ticket to Funnel Hacking Live, a plane ticket, and all that stuff…

Shortly after, (like the next week), she started getting her first real clients and started doing work that paid her bills.

Podcasting positive stress

There’s a principle behind this

THE LAW OF ACTION

Things will begin to conspire for your sake when you get clear on what you want, honest about where you are, and willing to put yourself in situations that cause good stress.

Put yourself in places of positive stress

Eustress = Growth

So here’s what happened to Marie next… (I tell these stories with her permission)

Marie went to Funnel Hacking Live, and they sold the 2 Comma Club X for the first time.

Russell did his pitch and it was amazing and there was a CRAZY table rush.

For 30 minutes after Russell’s speech, people can purchase and ask questions…

There’s a countdown clock showing the time left before the next speech, and after it ends, the program will be closed.

People were running to the back to sign up…

Positive stress countdown

There were only 10 minutes left on the timer when I sat down next to my sister who was talking to a friend in earnest.

Marie turned to me and said:

“Stephen, what should we do? We’re thinking of putting our money together under one account… then we’ll just share all the 2 Comma Club X events “

I said: “You could do that, but do you mind if I give my two cents on this?”

(I’ve talked about how questions invite revelation in the blog before… I learned this from a mentor/ leader that I had 10 years ago.)

I very much believe that questions invite revelation.

Here’s how it goes…

When you ask the question:

  • How can I get a discount?
  • How can I do this, but not as a full participating member?
  • How can I do this and not pay the full price?’

… you get an answer to that question.

So I said to Marie, “ I dare you to ask a different question.”

ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS?

Personal growth questions

I’ve watched how wealthy people deal react to a situation where they want something that’s more expensive than what they were planning on.

instead of saying, “I don’t know how to afford this…”

They say, “YES,” and then they figure out how to develop an asset that pays for what they want.

They ask: “What can I develop in order to pay for this expensive thing?’”

So I looked at my sister and said:

“Marie, I challenge to ask the question, ‘How can I afford the most expensive things and experiences this life has to offer?’ Answer that question and develop an asset that pays for your monthly membership of 2 Comma Club X.”

That was pretty intense, Marie only had $76 in her bank account at the time.

Affording personal growth

But Yeah, but that was still the answer.

She had a three week period while everyone was onboarded to the program to figure out how to pay…

(…it was a grand or something like that.)

I asked her: “Can you figure that out if you go and put yourself in a position of eustress?”

And she said: “I think so.”

So she got her own account!

Personal growth lessons

… and this is a big lesson for everybody.

POSITIVE STRESS

I know (as a reader of my blog) you’re probably crushing it and TOTALLY awesome…

But a lot of adults haven’t learned how to feel a little bit of positive stress and pain.

Not all pain’s bad. The point is NOT to be comfortable all the time.

One of the BIGGEST external based false beliefs I hear from people is:

“I would, but I’m just in a financial place to do it right now.”

Personal growth finances

I’m like, “Man, that’s the reason that you do it!”

You do it so that you can put yourself in a place of pressure that causes you to learn and grow at rates you would not be willing to put yourself in otherwise.

Now again, I’m not a financial advisor.

Challenge yourself

… and you might think this is really extreme. *I don’t care*

This is literally how I’ve been able to progress so fast.

I put myself in scenarios that I know I will figure out because there’s no other option. I voluntarily place my back against the wall, so that these scenarios happen.

And that’s what Marie did…

Within two months, she had her own business with cash flow of $10,000 a month.

Challenge yourself to personal growth

I asked her: “Would you have gone and done all that stuff if you had a lot of money in your bank?”

Can you guess what the answer was…? 😉

SMASH YOUR COMFORT ZONE

I swear one of the biggest problems people run into when they’re starting any kind of entrepreneurship is that things are too cushy.

You wont have personal growth if you're too cushy

Get uncomfortable! I dare you to feel a little pain.

Case in point…

When I left ClickFunnels, I had:

  • No product
  • No offer
  • No funnel
  • No team

Steven Larsen personal growth

… it was really intense. I don’t recommend that at all!

However, I did it because I knew I was experienced enough to figure it out, and because I knew that it meant that I couldn’t mess around.

I had to figure it out.

Steven Larsen positive stress

There was no mental let out at all. I couldn’t afford any distractions. The cost of me NOT showing up was too high…

…. within a month I had done 59 grand.

A lot of successful entrepreneurs know this principle, but the people who are brand new, often hit against the rocks…

They feel they need to have all the:

  • Resources
  • Time
  • Money
  • Energy
  • Support

…before they start.

Feeling positive stress

If you’re waiting for all your ducks to be in a row, then you won’t do it!

*You will back out*

You’ll find a way to stall… because it’s stressful… and it’s uncomfortable.

BACK TO A WALL GROWTH

Back to the wall personal growth

I work far more than most of you probably realize..(actually, it’s NOT as crazy anymore).

Often, now, I only work a seven/ eight hour day because I have a team and leverage.

But it wasn’t like that when I first started out.

When you start in this game there are few risks that you probably have to take, but they shouldn’t be stupid risks.

You need to:

  • Take a calculated risk
  • Find a mentor
  • Start moving

You need to be able to get yourself in a place and a position where you don’t care that it’s uncomfortable and that it doesn’t feel good.

You need to feel a little bit of pain and discomfort to growth.

If you are NOT able to back yourself against the wall, you’re NOT gonna do it.

Instead, you’ll wait for my next Podcast episode because you need the NEXT secret or the NEXT hack…

Don't wait for personal growth

*DON’T WAIT*

You have so much MORE information than I ever had when I started this game…

So please, please, take action…

Life will throw unexpected scenarios at you that’ll put your back against the wall, and you will behave and perform in ways that we didn’t know you could.

But the individual who’s willing to put themselves against the wall, and take action from a place of eustress, is much better off.

You don’t need all your ducks in a row and the moons to be aligned.

Don't need all the answers for personal growth

You don’t need ALL the answers!

WELCOME TO ENTREPRENEURSHIP

I don’t know how to do the majority of the things that I have planned for the rest of this year…

Steve Larsen personal growth

…but I know I’ll figure it out.

I’m NOT waiting for someone to come give me the answer. I will figure it out, and then I’ll create a system and leverage.

I will feel uncomfortable.

Once a month there’s something where I really don’t want to do something. I say to Colton: “Dude, I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to do this right now.”

…and he’ll laugh and I’ll laugh.

We have these little bouncing ball chairs, I’ll crank music, and I’ll do something crazy…

What I’m not a fan of shunning your feelings. Feel your feelings! Take a moment to freak out.

Take a moment to have a little poopy-pants syndrome, that’s okay…

Poopy-pants syndrome and personal growth

… but understand that you are NOT your feelings; I love that from Tony Robbins.

You just have to sit back, and be like, “Oh man I need to do this thing.”

There are two or three specific things right now that I’m legitimately NOT looking forward to doing. I don’t want to do them.

They’re the kinds of things that keep me up late because I don’t want to do what I’m supposed to do tomorrow, but it’s not about that…

I’m NOT my feelings.

I’m not about shunning emotions and becoming this stone machine. I’m a human being, and we are emotional… so let me feel the emotion, and then after I’ve given myself time to freak out…

Freaking out about personal growth

…then I put myself against the wall.

This might sound weird and extreme, but whatever, it works.

We’ve been cash flowing pretty hard for the last eight months… (but at the same rate).

It’s been like 100 to 125 grand a month every month for the last eight/ nine months.

So this past little bit, I’ve been sittin’ back and thinking like, “Crap, I’m still working seven, eight, nine hours a day. It’s about leverage now…”

…and that’s the eustress that I’m placing myself under.

Part of that’s about me growing, scaling, and starting to create systems.

I’ve got two content teams, a funnel team, and half of an admin team.

I am doing it… but I’m hitting the next phase, and I feel it.

I know that I personally need to grow in order to handle it… and I feel it. I’m hitting the wall. I know it, and I’m okay with experiencing that.

OVER TO YOU?

  • What’s going on in your life?
  • What excuses are you using?
  • Where are you NOT growing?

Like… “Stephen, I can’t because of x, y, and z.”

I go nuts in One Funnel Away Challenge when I hear that…

What's your personal growth excuse

When someone says, “Well, Stephen, I just don’t have ALL the answers needed.”

Are you kidding? Every single day! Welcome to entrepreneurship.

I don’t know how to answer a lot of things that I’m supposed to be doing on tomorrow, but I know I’ll figure it out. I’m willing to feel a little bit of discomfort on the way.

But MOST human beings out there, a lot of adults especially, are NOT willing to feel discomfort…

JUST KEEP SWIMMING…

Do you remember the movie, Finding Nemo?

Finding Nemo and positive stress

I’ve got three little girls, so we watch a lot of movies like that now…

(Pixar is awesome. Good storytelling, obviously. I like to look at it from that standpoint.)

… but just like those clownfish that go out of their little home, look around, and then come back in again and again…

Most adults are like that… they never do a thing.

They start out, and then:

  • Discomfort
  • Unknown
  • Fear
  • Abyss

Challenge yourself to do something

… and then they pull back in to safety.

You need to feel positive stress on purpose and find a way to put your back against the wall.

WANNA GROW YOUR WALLET?

If you’re still working a nine to five right now, and you’ve been wanting to quit and become an entrepreneur… if this is your dream…

The most likely reason why you haven’t done it yet is that your life’s too comfortable.

You won't feel positive stress if you're too comfortable

Find a way to get a little bit uncomfortable, I dare you. Then come tell me if it did not change you and/or your wallet along the way.

I’m pretty forward with this message, but I’m just trying to use what I taught my sister as an example.

  • Yeah, yeah, it’s certainly scary.
  • Yeah but this could happen! Yep, it could’ve.
  • But that could happen! Yep, mm-hmm.

What personal growth do you want

…I mean, seriously, what do you want?

Be willing to behave differently in order to be a different person and live with those who live differently.

  • The rest of the masses are clinging desperately to status quo.
  • The rest of humanity’s like, “Please please, accept me!”

Challenge yourself to something different

…that’s what they’re doing!

You gotta behave and operate differently to be different. So I’m gonna go do things that are unorthodox.

… “but Stephen, it could be risky?”

Yeah, so is sitting on my butt on the couch and waiting for a slow, painful death knowing that I’ve done nothing in my life… and that I’ve NOT done anything to my full capacity.

…AND I’ve NOT reached my potential.

Reach your full potential with positive stress

That is hell on earth in my opinion, and I will NOT live that way.

I’m asking you to do the same.

Get tough with yourself and figure out what you need to do?

What do you need to do for personal growth

I’ve found that I cannot voluntarily place myself very easily in situations where my back is against the wall. I need to create an environment and a scenario that supports me….

  • So I left my job
  • I brought on employees
  • I brought on teams

… it wasn’t a risk, we had the cash flow, but then it got tight.

Q: So what did that do?

A: It made me learn how to get more cash flow.

Does that make sense?

MY BIG GOAL

Personal growth goals

I talked about this in my goal video for this year… (I want to hit 4 million).

I’m trying to figure out the next thing in my life that’s scary. That legitimately scares the crap out of me.

… because it will cause me to behave and level up as a human being faster than me just willing it into existence.

Just willing it, never works. I must do it with an environment.

NOW…

Take a moment to sit back and be introspective…

You have something in your life that you’ve been wanting to do. You know it’s there, but you haven’t done it because you’re staying comfy…

We’ve all got something…

Positive stress is uncomfortable

For me, it’s my book.

I know how in depth I’m gonna dive on it in order to make sure I’ve got everything set and my bases covered. It’s gonna be a month long project.

I think I’m gonna take all of June just for the book…

So please take stock…

I dare you to write down what you know that you’ve been wanting to do, and then start thinking through how you can orchestrate an environment where your back is voluntarily against the wall.

I mean truly against the wall, no let out.

… and then you’ll do things differently to how you’ve ever done them before in your life.

You’ll look back in three years:

“What? What’s up son, uh! You a bad mamajama!”

Positive stress bad mamajama

I look at myself and go: “Holy crap! Look what you got done! Wow, very few people have done that. Why did that work?”

… and it’s because I was willing to feel a little bit of pressure! #EUSTRESS

Hey, just real quick:

A few months ago Russell asked me to write a chapter for a secret project he was doing. I had to write a chapter for a book, this was the letter I got from him.

He said:

“Hey Stephen, let me ask you a quick question…

You suddenly lose all your money, along with your name and your reputation, and only have your marketing know-how left.

You have bills piled high and people harassing you for money over the phone.

You have a guaranteed roof over your head, a phone line, an internet connection, and a ClickFunnels account for only one month.

You no longer have your big guru name, your following, your JV partners. Other than your vast marketing experience, you’re an unknown newbie…

What would you do from day #1 to day #30 to save yourself?

Russell Brunson

Hey, if you want to see my answer and a bunch of other marketers who also answered that in this amazing book and summit, just go to 30days.com/stephen.

Steven Larsen One Funnel Away Challenge

You can see the entire summit, you can see the book, you can see what we wrote in there and each of our detailed plans. Just go to 30days.com/stephen.

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