After personally coaching 1,800+ people, here’s the most common stereotypes I see…
My wife asked me a fascinating question the other night, and it got me thinking. She asked about the reasons why some people take action and succeed, while others stay stuck.
She asked me how different types of people approach the same situations when I coach them.
Is there a difference between the way that Millenials and Baby Boomers approach becoming entrepreneurs and building a business?
I realized, that after coaching 1800+ people through this process, that I’d seen certain patterns over and over again.
And what was really interesting is that these patterns have less to do with funnels and marketing, than they do with mindset. Yep, seriously!
Each generation typically has its own unique set of gifts and challenges – its own particular issues.
Obviously, I’m talking in massive stereotypes here.
However, I’m going to bite the bullet and get these patterns out in the open for the sole purpose of preventing you from falling prey to them.
So I’m going to share with you a few of the patterns that I’ve stereotypically seen with my students.
If you’re not getting the results you want, it may be that your holding yourself back unnecessarily – I know I was.
BUT before we go any further, you need to promise me that you won’t get offended. So raise your right hand, and say:
I hate it when anybody tries to fit me into a box, and I’m not trying to do that to you at all. I’m trying to be sensitive because I hate when people try and categorize me.
My whole intention is to liberate you from any unconscious patterns that could be holding you back as an entrepreneur.
Your business and your results are a reflection of you. Your business and your results will grow in direct proportion to your own growth – James Arthur Ray
At the end of this blog, I’m also going to share with you my personal strategies that I use to combat these stereotypes in my life every day. I have my own routines that I use daily to help free myself from any limitations and hang-ups that I have. And they really work…
Ready to bust through some barriers? Okay, let’s do this!
WHAT’S GOING ON?
First of all, let’s set the stage here:
There has never been a time in the history of the entire world where so much information and so many answers are available at your fingertips. There are so many answers out there. So many things are already solved for you – if you look.
Yet people many don’t know how to go and look up stuff on their own. We’re not yet a culture of self-teaching. And that’s why those who can self-teach can blow-up their success.
We live in a very over-stimulated society. There’s lots of addiction out there. Everything is available 24/7, but there’s a lack of the discipline and daily routines that lead to success.
Which means that it’s a three-headed beast that we need to conquer if we want to be successful.
Here are the 3 mindsets that you need to take on to succeed:
- Realise that not knowing how to do something is no longer an excuse.
- Have the discipline to turn up each day and do the work.
- Be introspective enough to see which personal weaknesses you need to tackle to succeed.
I’m not saying I’m perfect, but I do try to live with intent day by day, by day.
First, I want to get one thing clear, I freakin’ hate the anti-millennial propaganda. It seems like every generation moans about the next one.
But the truth is that each generation reacts against the one before it. In my opinion, every generation has strengths and weakness – and that’s just fine.
You just need to develop the introspection necessary to see what you need to focus on, and the courage to deal with anything that’s standing in your way.
So, now we are going to dive into those stereotypes as I perceive them.. and *cough* Remember, that you’ve promised not to get offended
If we’re talking about the Millennials Stereotype, what I typically see is:
- Vast amounts of information mixed with the fingertip training that they need to use it.
- They know how to text, tweet and do all the things. They understand tech, and they’re not afraid to use it.
- Stereotypically they lack a bit of discipline – but not always.
- Millennials are dreamers – they understand possibilities.
As a millennial myself, I had a huge wake-up call when I realized, “Look, no one owes you anything. You’re not deserving of anything. You need to work your tail off.”
I feel like there’s a lack of just getting up and getting crap done regardless of how you feel about it.
We’ve been sold on the concept that we deserve everything just because we exist, “Oh yeah, I should get that, I deserve it.” Man, that is bull crap. No one owes me anything. And I try and live like that.
I hate when people say, “Here get this product, you deserve it.” It makes me wanna throw up and not buy their product – no matter how good it is.
When somebody says, “You deserve it,” that’s garbage. It is a lie. It’s a lie of this generation. It is a lie of our communities.
In my opinion, No one owes you anything, and You don’t deserve anything. And that’s how I look at my life… I don’t think that “my customer owes me money,” or that “I deserve success.” That’s freakin’ garbage.
No one owes me a dime. No one owes me any kind of credit. No one owes me. You relieve a lot of mental stress in your life when you think that way.
When I look at how undisciplined we are as a society, it freaks me out.
If you’re spending all your time watching Netflix in the evening, and you don’t have something up and running, then shame on you! Stop complaining and work at it.
I’m not saying that I don’t take breaks, I believe humans were built were built to work hard, at things and have resistance. That’s good. That’s healthy. I want that.
There’s a huge, a vast, a ridiculous amount of hustle in my life right now. And I expect it, I welcome it, I smile at it. I’m like, “What’s up, son? Bring it on! Come on get ya some. This is my time. You’re on my turf, and I’m gonna tear you apart.”
I’m gonna hustle, hustle, hustle. But not until I die. I’m not here to just work.
There are a lot of different messages out there:
There’s Tim Ferriss with his Four Hour Work week. (He didn’t start that way, but that’s where he ended up.) He works four hours a week on his business. That’s cool!
Now let’s contrast that with what Gary Vee talks about: Hustle till your face falls off! Hustle till ya die, right? That’s totally his message.
That’s two conflicting messages. I believe the answer is somewhere in between. That’s how I run.
I’m gonna go, and I’m gonna build that funnel and that funnel. I have massive projects on my plate right now. Absolutely gigantic. I am the sole funnel builder. And that’s totally fine. I’m cool with that.
Then, on the other side, we have the Baby Boomers. Let’s say, 50 years plus. The stereotypical traits I see here are:
- Lack of tech knowledge
- Stereotypically, they are really intense workers. They had to sacrifice – it’s their generational upbringing.
- A lot of times they operate from a scarcity/ fearful standpoint, They think that businesses still require a briefcase, a suit, and a meeting to start the day.
I don’t ever have to wear a shirt and tie except to church.
In fact, when I go and consult for people, they’re like, “What other specifications do you have?” And I’m like, “First class if you want to.” But be completely honest, right now anyway, I just don’t care.
I try and listen to music as much as I possibly can, and wear shoes as little as I can.
Business culture has changed. I find that there’s a lot of unnecessary professionalism in the baby boomer expectations.
THE SWEET SPOT
I’m 30, I’m barely a millennial. From the 30 to 50, I find that that, stereotypically, it’s the category of person that takes the most action.
They know how to use the tools. They are not complainers, and they’re fine when the market punches them. It’s kinda the sweet spot.
When I get somebody who’s a millennial, I’m cool with that, I just know that they’re gonna be a little bit sensitive. There’s often a lack of mental toughness.
I was a mentally weak person. I didn’t know how to handle anything that was negative in my life. I had to learn those things. That is literally one of the reasons I joined the Army.
Millennials are dreamers – they understand possibilities. It’s beautiful. I’m a dreamer. I love it.
My first born is a dreamer too. She’s 100% entrepreneur, I can already tell. She’s a problem solver. I didn’t teach her a lot of the things she’s doing. And I’m like “Holy crap! You’re a really smart kid. You know how to solve problems.”
She’s gonna turn five soon. She already has interest in the stuff I’m doing.
Contrast this to the Baby boomers who have a lot of barriers, and not just because of the tech. There’s a professionalism that they think is needed to be an entrepreneur. They’re probably not going to turn up barefoot to a meeting.
In today’s age it’s not about you being a professional. It’s about being you, but LOUDER.
Again, please remember that I’m speaking in massively general terms.
There is, however, a stereotypical go-getter that I see from the millennial side all the way all to the baby boomers. This person has learned to become introspective and is a self-solver. Self-learning is one of their highest priorities.
They’ve learned how identify their own false belief, and they are motivated to tackle the ones that matter.
If you try to tackle every single one of your false beliefs, every one of your little character flaws, that’s the quickest way to get depressed.
About two years before I left college, I had no technical skill. I was literally a dime a dozen. There was nothing different for me compared to everybody else on my marketing degree. And that’s one of the reasons why I chose to learn funnels.
Another issue that I had was that I wasn’t confident speaking. I knew that I needed to be able to speak, so I worked on that too. I put myself in difficult situations, and I did the thing I didn’t want to do.
Now I can just turn the camera on. Now I can speak in front of a lot of people. I’ll be speaking at funnel hacking live in front of 4,500 people, and I’m not nervous. I’m stoked to the core.
Whatever your character does not let you do, grab the highest leverage thing that you can go tackle, and grab it and break it.
See the stories, the experiences, and the beliefs that are upholding that false belief, and reach down and break them! Rebuild yourself! Pick out the blueprints you want to use and remake yourself.
When I started doing that, that’s when I started making money. I was the biggest issue in the business! Not the marketing. Not the product. But ME. I sucked at delivering. That was my Achilles heel!
You gotta figure out what your weakness and conquer that too. Remember, the obstacle is the way.
Over the years, I’ve seen a lots offers, and looked at a lot of people’s funnels, and the pattern has always been the same:
Could the marketing be better? Yeah! It could. Could the funnel be better? Yeah, it could. But most of the time, I find that the battle is mental.
I fight with my student’s psyches way more than I ever thought I would.
Some of them are total rockstars, but most people don’t understand that the market requires them to be a little bit different in order to succeed. Sometimes, they’re not willing to make the adjustment they need to make it work.
If you ask, “Stephen, how long’s this gonna take for me to go through?” I can already tell you’re losing! If you ask, “Stephen, how long’s it gonna take me for me to go through your model builds?” I can already, that’s a losing mentality!
You’re already working from a freaking scarcity standpoint when you ask stupid questions like that!
I’m not trying to offend anybody, I’m just being real and raw about this. Second place gets no reward in business.
Your business and your results are a reflection of you. Your business and your results will grow in direct proportion to your own growth – James Arthur Ray
When I was at ClickFunnels, I got to listen to Tony Robbins and Robert Kiyosaki while they talked to Russell. I did a lot of projects for Marcus Lemonis. Some massive players.
A lot of the time, before they did an interview, you’d see them in the corner kinda jazzing up. They understood that they needed to get into the right state.
They had to be an attractive character, and even if it wasn’t their natural character, they learned how to create one.
And so that’s what I started to do. I learned how to get myself into a fighting state. Next, I want to share a few of my methods with you.
A lot of what I do to manage my state has to with my morning routine. I’ve noticed that when I turn that lever, it really sets the tone for the rest of the day.
I’m not perfect at it, but I’m getting more perfect at it. It’s helped me a lot.
Here are a few things that I do to control my state:
#1: I exercise in the morning, hard. I don’t just go for a jog. It’s gotta be hard. For me, that’s where I’m practicing getting in my war state before I get to my desk.
#2: Every Monday morning I yell, “Woo! It’s Monday, baby!” on Instagram. I yell like crazy.
I even go down to street corners and yell it in front of the 9am traffic. No joke! I don’t care. It’s not for them. It’s for me.
Why? Because it kinda freaks me out a little bit. My adrenaline spikes up like crazy, and I know that I can push my limits.
#3: I have a mannequin and his name’s poverty. I beat up poverty every single morning. That’s my warm-up. I listen to crazy rage music and beat up the doubt.
I write down all the things that people have said about me that are negative! I’m trying to confront the fear and do it anyway.
People call me “idiot.” People just say, “You’re not qualified.” People might say “I’m lazy.”
Some stupid lady said, “You’re totally a scam!” I was like, “I don’t even know what that means. Please explain what you’re talking about and go look at all the testimonials of all the people I’ve helped. I’m not a scam.”
There’s a whole bunch of stuff.
“You’re too emotional. You’re all over the place. You’re worthless, Stephen. You’re worthless. This is ridiculous. This is all crap!” I’ve had people say it all to me.
I don’t freaking care. Instead, I confront it. I write it on my mannequin and beat it up.
My life got so much easier when I came up with a system to medicate all of the negative things that were going on in my head.
One of the first ones that ever have made me feel bad was when I was going to counseling they wanted to test me for ADHD.
I was like, “No! What are you talking about?” I didn’t want anyone to think there was something wrong with me.
I didn’t wanna take the test, but I took it and came back to the counselor.
He said, “You don’t officially have ADHD, but you have a lot of symptoms of somebody who does.”
And I flipped out because I was a perfectionist. I was like, “I don’t want anything to be wrong with me. I don’t want someone to categorize me. Don’t tell me I’m not perfect.” It rocked my world.
It wasn’t later until I found out that ADHD is a freaking superpower. That’s the reason I can outwork 90% of the people out there.
Did you know that most billionaires are dyslexic?
Whatever it is that’s negative in your life, you can turn it into a superpower.
Entrepreneurs are a special breed. You guys are epic. We’re epic. This is not normal stuff to go do. It can be a lonely game – but gotta push through. You gotta forgive and grow.
When it comes to the business, it’s usually not an offer problem. It’s usually a storytelling and marketing problem. That’s the reason the stuff isn’t going down.
But when you take one more step back, when it comes to the entrepreneur, it’s usually a psyche problem.
They haven’t quite learned the mentality yet. They’re still scared of getting hurt. They’re still scared of getting burned. They don’t know quite how to deal with failure.
They think “If this fails, I’ve failed?” And they start comparing themselves to others success stories. The fastest way to depression, right there.
The only person you should compare yourself to is yourself. How much progress are you making? How many obstacle have you overcome?
Successful entrepreneurs focus on how much progress they’ve made. It’s the best way ever to get your self-worth and your personal value out of the game.
If you’re scared of talking like I was, come up with a plan of how to deal with that issue.
- Go figure out what it is for you? Is there some character flaw that you have? Don’t beat yourself up, just identify it.
- Figure out a way around it. How can you get into state that helps you deal with it mentally?
Don’t be a chicken…
Until next time – Keep Crushing It!
A few months ago, Russell asked me to write a chapter for a secret project he was doing, and I had to write a chapter for a book, and this was the prompt, this was the letter I got from him:
Let me ask you a quick question.
You suddenly lose all your money along with your name and your reputation and only have your marketing know-how left.
You have bills piled high and people harassing you for money over the phone.
You have a guaranteed roof over your head, a phone line, an internet connection, and a ClickFunnels account for only one month.
You no longer have your big guru name, your following, your JV partners, other than your vast marketing experience, you’re an unknown newbie.
What would you do from day one to day to save yourself?
If you wanna see my answer and the answers of a bunch of other amazing marketers, then just go to days.com/stephen.